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DH Movie reviews: get ready for Oscar

The red carpet. The little gold statue. The self-importance. It must be Oscar time. This Sunday, The Academy of Television Arts and Sciences pays tribute to its own with the 84th annual Academy AwardsR. Let's be honest, you don't care about my picks or whether I win the office pool, so instead, here's my prediction for what the night holds in store... On the Red Carpet: If you took a drink every time someone was asked, "Who are you wearing?" you'd never survive to see the telecast. So don't do that. Instead wonder who'll end up on the best and worst dressed list. Worst? Odds would have been strongly in favor of Tilda Swinton, should she have been nominated for "We Need to Talk about Kevin." Instead, look for Gary Oldman to whip out the weird with some odd version of a tuxedo, necktie or crazy eyewear. As for the best? Brad and George never disappoint and Michelle Williams is always a risk-taker, but the good kind (time to take a page, Bjork). For the best and most unabashed coverage, catch The Fashion Police on E! as Joan Rivers and her minions say what none of the red carpet drones will.

The opening act: Billy, we missed you, we really missed you. Although Eddie Murphy could have been very interesting. Billy Crystal, all 64 years of him, will certainly bring back his infamous opener, inserting himself into the nominated films while singing an original song parodying them. If he decides not to do this, I won't be the only one who's disappointed.

The whole shebang: Can't get enough of Oscar? Check out the entire day's worth of coverage for a complete schedule of sanctioned Oscar goodness. If you watch "Good Morning America" all the way through to "Jimmy Kimmel Live: After the Academy Awards," you honestly could watch over 15 hours of coverage. Some might call that dedication. Others might remember that their mom told them if they don't have anything nice to say...

Get the app: There's an app for that. Of course there is! "The OscarsR app has more cameras than anywhere else following all the action on the Red Carpet, in the Kodak Theatre and even at the ultra A-list after party, the Governor's ball. This is the perfect companion app to have when watching the show on TV." Or so they say.

Make your own swag bag: Seriously, you can do this. Your bag may not contain a Louis Vuitton purse, spa package, or trip to Belize, but the Oscar blog offers tips like: face masks, personalized chocolate truffles, flavored syrups and workouts. Or you could just throw in some RaisinetsR, movie passes, microwave popcorn and a water bottle. But if you want to make personalized chocolate truffles, here's my address...

What are you most looking forward to about the night's festivities?

Pancake time at House Party Headquarters!

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